Oh I miss my friends.
I miss having fun.
I miss Friday nights out.
I miss lots of things beginning with 'F' - family, fish from the fish market, feeding the ducks, my feet being tickled, feeling sexy, fu**ing without worrying about waking the baby or squirting milk everywhere, fu**ing generally, farting, errr actually I don't miss that, in fact that was the one thing yesterday that made me realise how much I miss everything else! It made us laugh so hard like we'd not laughed in a long time, tears were rolling down my cheeks, I nearly dropped the baby!
I'm not complaining here, I'm fully aware that I've chosen this path and I am very grateful for everything I have and don't have, I am just having a moment of missing. Missing the boat and all our beautiful neighbours up there. The ones that would just give a nod as they walked by, shout a greeting and make you smile. There's none of that down here. We're locked up in a little house now, without hoards of people walking by asking how much it costs to buy boats these days or whether or not they can have a ride.
No short walk to the market to catch the latest bargain or the weeks fresh vegetables, or to meet a friend for a cuppa. Nobody calling to say hey, what you up to, I'm in your area, fancy meeting up? No crawling in at 4am after a crazy night out. No lie-in. No good night's sleep.
Ok enough of that! No need to dwell on the negative here. I'm going to start sounding like I'm suffering with post natal depression, maybe I am?! I'm not. Don't worry. It's just a moment. It's that time of year too. Silly season. I accept that I am a grown woman now, with responsibilities. My mispent youthfulness can be channelled into something else more productive. It's fun to have new and interesting projects. It's fun to not get much sleep and see how crazy it makes you.
Life is fun.
It's Friday night.
It's time to... oh, the baby's woken up...